Post by jdesmond on Jan 14, 2019 0:04:38 GMT
New Year's Greetings from New Jersey, to all of you ladies and gentlemen,
I had a heart attack in October. The docs say that when I was in the cardiac catheter lab - trying to insert a balloon pump to assist it - my heart stopped twice, had to shock me to restart it.
If I may give you some avdice:
1 - See the doctor occasionally. If he tells you the high blood pressure or chlorestrol or atrial fib will cause you trouble, do something about it. Heart attacks ain't just inconvenient, they're PAINFUL.
2 - If you think you're having a heart attack, call the ambulance IMMEDIATELY. Don't dilly-dally. The doctors today do things - every day - that would have been called miracles when I was young. But when it's your die roll, you still want every modifier in your favor. Even if 'twas a false alarm, the EMT's won't mind.
3 - If you work at or frequent a place with a 'defibrillator under glass', read the instructions. Beforehand. If you know what you're doing, You Can Save A Life.
OK, now some less serious stuf:
I have acquired a cardiologist and a Primary Care Physician. They are both half my age, female, and extraordinarily attractive. I do what they tell me. I am a Dirty Old Man, and I want them to smile at me.
Have appointments at the Cardiac Rehabilitation Center - 'the hospital gym' - doing my hamster imitation on the treadmills, three times a week 'till spring.
I am taking a bunch of medicines. Some times I chant their names to Handel's music
"Clopidogrel,
Furosemide,
Metoprolol,
Panto-oo-prazole..."
Sometimes I think of a fantasy novel, in which they are wizards of dubious alignment...
Am wearing, 24/7, a portable defibrillator. There's a battery-pack with touchscreen and non-panic button (press if alarm goes off but you feel OK). Worn on neck strap, it's about size and weight of old 35-mm camera, occasionally makes me feel like tourist. Is attached to bunch of sensors and electrodes, kept in place by straps around chest and over shoulders. Mayhaps has given me new empathy for the trials of brassiere-wearing Americans...
Had invitations for holiday visits to out-of-town friends. Said "With the defibrillator, the second battery (change to recharge every day), the battery charger, the transformer for the battery charger, the dozen pill bottles - I have Too Much Baggage - literally!"
Lot of food just 'doesn't taste as good'. Have gotten sensitive to the taste of even slightly rancid cooking oils. Shocked at amount of salt in most of stuf on my shelves.
So, to you and everyone you care about, my best wishes for a healthy, happy, peaceful and prosperous 2019.
And in time of trouble, remember what the coach said, when they showed him The Robot Quarterback...
... "This, too, shall pass."
